I think that all the statements I make in my writing should be prefaced or placed in a context which says something like, "Lord, make me the kind of person who can really say this (or ask for this), from the heart."
I do believe what I say, and yet my faith is so small. I write a lot, perhaps, as a way of asking that the understanding I express in my words might grow and become more of a reality in my heart. Words are easy. But I know from the way I live, and the way I look at people, and the way I make judgments that I scarcely understand the things I say, or the mysteries to which I turn in prayer.
It is not that I lack conviction about the truth. But I am unfaithful and divided in heart, and I try too hard to hold onto things. I do not know how to love well.
Jesus, give me, in my heart, complete trust in You. Give me the capacity and the awareness that will enable me to ask You for this kind of trust.
Have mercy on me, a poor sinner.
